![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
...
I ain't leavin'!
[Wait...]
Hey, is everythin' okay? You ain't hurt or anythin' right?
I ain't leavin'!
[Wait...]
Hey, is everythin' okay? You ain't hurt or anythin' right?
Everything's fine you don't need to keep checking up on me.
[And showing up. And wanting to go out. ALL THE TIME. It's also yelled out towards the door btw.]
[And showing up. And wanting to go out. ALL THE TIME. It's also yelled out towards the door btw.]
I ain't checkin' on ya.
[The rattling stops at least...
Only then... there's a rather loud thud.
Which can only be Naruto throwing himself at the door, right?]
[The rattling stops at least...
Only then... there's a rather loud thud.
Which can only be Naruto throwing himself at the door, right?]
[Holy shit Naruto you are annoying. The massive thud is enough to finally break his patience, Sasuke getting up to unlock the fucking door to punch him in his stupid face or something.
Except after unlocking it, he changes his mind at the last minute and sits back down. He'll just let him smack his face on the door a couple more times.]
Except after unlocking it, he changes his mind at the last minute and sits back down. He'll just let him smack his face on the door a couple more times.]
[DAMNIT SASUKE.
He's just going to shove his elbow against the door a few times... before slumping against it.]
What'd you do?
He's just going to shove his elbow against the door a few times... before slumping against it.]
What'd you do?
[Now that the banging has stopped, he finally moves across the room again, throwing the door open. And just staring at the blond ninja that just sort of fell into his room.]
What? [What do you want? Why are you here?]
What? [What do you want? Why are you here?]
[He fell. Of course he fell, and also - he totally made a point of grabbing hold of Sasuke on his way too! It's a natural reaction!]
Whoa--
Hey! What'd you do that for!?
Whoa--
Hey! What'd you do that for!?
[Being grabbed like that gains the expected reaction- Sasuke practically kicking him off and shoving him away as he ends up falling half way down himself before regaining his balance.]
Dammit Naruto, what the fuck do you want?
Dammit Naruto, what the fuck do you want?
[When Severus awakes early in the morning, he's met with the sight of his emu playfully galloping around the room, tossing something up and down in the air as though it's caught game. It takes Severus a few moments to focus his eyesight on what it is, blearily blinking through a heavy fatigue weighing heavily in his bones and in his head. He scrubs his face with his hand, wiping his tired eyes. Good Lord, the sound of the emu's feet slapping about on the floor.]
What are you doing, you ridiculous bird?
[The emu suddenly stops in its tracks and trots around on the spot to look straight at Severus, a condom hanging limp from its beak. It's looking mighty pleased with itself.
Bewildered, Severus throws the covers back and climbs out of bed. He steps across to the bird and snatches the condom from its grasp. The bird doesn't let go at first; the condom stretches and Severus accidentally lets it go, causing it snap back in the emu's face. This startles the emu, and it reels around to run off.]
Come back here! [The bird does as it's told and wearily almost flinches away as Severus makes another grab for the condom, this time successfully snatching it away.
And it's then that Severus notices: the floor is littered with shredded condoms and condom packets, which lead in a trail to the bathroom door. Which is open. He approaches the bathroom and spots a basket that the emu has been rummaging through. Cards of the most profane nature, with images depicting different coital positions, are scattered about on the floor.
Severus recoils with a look of disgust, then glances up at the door that leads into his neighbour's room; the person whom he's sharing the bathroom with.
Right. He is not tolerating this.
He marches up to the door and pounds on it, loudly.]
What are you doing, you ridiculous bird?
[The emu suddenly stops in its tracks and trots around on the spot to look straight at Severus, a condom hanging limp from its beak. It's looking mighty pleased with itself.
Bewildered, Severus throws the covers back and climbs out of bed. He steps across to the bird and snatches the condom from its grasp. The bird doesn't let go at first; the condom stretches and Severus accidentally lets it go, causing it snap back in the emu's face. This startles the emu, and it reels around to run off.]
Come back here! [The bird does as it's told and wearily almost flinches away as Severus makes another grab for the condom, this time successfully snatching it away.
And it's then that Severus notices: the floor is littered with shredded condoms and condom packets, which lead in a trail to the bathroom door. Which is open. He approaches the bathroom and spots a basket that the emu has been rummaging through. Cards of the most profane nature, with images depicting different coital positions, are scattered about on the floor.
Severus recoils with a look of disgust, then glances up at the door that leads into his neighbour's room; the person whom he's sharing the bathroom with.
Right. He is not tolerating this.
He marches up to the door and pounds on it, loudly.]
[There's one arm out in front of him, blocking the kick whilst the other-- reaches to grab Sasuke by the ankle.]
OI BASTARD DON'T KICK ME.
[He tugs, of course. :|]
OI BASTARD DON'T KICK ME.
[He tugs, of course. :|]
[Sasuke expected the occasional thumping at his front door when certain people showed up to see him, but never from his bathroom door. He planned on ignoring anyone that came looking for him today, but coming from the other room meant it was likely to be his neighbour, Snape, who didn't seem the type to be knocking for him without a valid reason.
Today had honestly been sort of a shit day so far and his patience was already running thin, so the door is pulled open to reveal an annoyed looking ninja.]
Yeah?
Today had honestly been sort of a shit day so far and his patience was already running thin, so the door is pulled open to reveal an annoyed looking ninja.]
Yeah?
OW.
WHAT THE HELL, STOP KICKIN' ME.
[Another tug, and actually - he scrambles to his feet and....
yeah, there's his fist.]
WHAT THE HELL, STOP KICKIN' ME.
[Another tug, and actually - he scrambles to his feet and....
yeah, there's his fist.]
[He's about to pound again on the door, harder, when he hears footfalls approaching it and the door handle turning.]
Explain the meaning of this. [He points with a thrust of his finger down at the basket laden with vulgar goods.
Behind him, the emu can be seen gaily trotting past the bathroom doorway, tossing another condom in the air and catching it with its beak. Never mind the fact that Severus is in his pyjamas or that his hair is a mess. Never mind that there are pillow lines streaking down the side of his face.
Never mind that the emu trots past the doorway again in the other direction with an excited, haphazard kick of its legs and a deep, happy drumming sound coming from the depth of its throat. The emu is clearly having the time of its life frolicking around with the condoms.]
Explain the meaning of this. [He points with a thrust of his finger down at the basket laden with vulgar goods.
Behind him, the emu can be seen gaily trotting past the bathroom doorway, tossing another condom in the air and catching it with its beak. Never mind the fact that Severus is in his pyjamas or that his hair is a mess. Never mind that there are pillow lines streaking down the side of his face.
Never mind that the emu trots past the doorway again in the other direction with an excited, haphazard kick of its legs and a deep, happy drumming sound coming from the depth of its throat. The emu is clearly having the time of its life frolicking around with the condoms.]
[By the time the punch lands Sasuke's own fist has already curled up in a tight ball, the ninja hunching forward from the blow as he sends a punch right back towards Naruto's gut.]
[One day.
One day.
The punch instantly has him doubling over, but it's nothing he can't handle. So with one arm wrapped around his waist he uses the other to try and grab Sasuke around the neck.]
One day.
The punch instantly has him doubling over, but it's nothing he can't handle. So with one arm wrapped around his waist he uses the other to try and grab Sasuke around the neck.]
[Two can play that game. As soon as Naruto's arm ends up around his neck, instead of attempting to break free he wraps an arm around Naruto's instead. It's sort of an awkward position like this, but he decides it may just be easier to try and choke the blond to death first.
Well, not actual death. Probably.]
Well, not actual death. Probably.]
[There's a growl from Naruto as that arm snakes around his neck, and he manages to kick out with one of his feet-- which ends pretty badly because it's enough to unbalance him, and with Sasuke's arm around his neck, there's surely only one way for him to fall?]
For fuck's- [With the way they're carrying on right now it doesn't take much to unbalance the two of them. It almost happens in slow motion, the way Naruto falls into him and then Sasuke himself ends up toppling backwards, bringing Naruto down with him.]
Damnit!
[He falls. Of course... and makes sure to move his arm away from Sasuke as best he can, but that doesn't really work.
So, he lands. On his knees, either side of Sasuke. One arm wrapped under his neck and the other pressed against the floor to try and put space between them.]
GET UP!
[He falls. Of course... and makes sure to move his arm away from Sasuke as best he can, but that doesn't really work.
So, he lands. On his knees, either side of Sasuke. One arm wrapped under his neck and the other pressed against the floor to try and put space between them.]
GET UP!
[Sasuke's brow furrows as he is about to snap back with a "what?" but then he looks down and sees it. For fuck's sake, when he'd received that basket and tossed it into the bathroom's trashcan (toss being the operative word here- it was too big for that trashbin and just ended up toppling it over and scattering items on the floor but fuck if he was going to deal with it right now) he thought that would be the end of it at least for now.
But no. No, now here is is, staring at some giant bird (why the fuck is there a bird in his room) happily chirping away with comdoms hanging out its beak and if Sasuke were anyone else, he may have laughed.
But he isn't, so all he can do is raise an eyebrow at the bizarre scene in front of him, before eyes make their way back to Snape instead.]
It's not my fault your bird went through the trash.
But no. No, now here is is, staring at some giant bird (why the fuck is there a bird in his room) happily chirping away with comdoms hanging out its beak and if Sasuke were anyone else, he may have laughed.
But he isn't, so all he can do is raise an eyebrow at the bizarre scene in front of him, before eyes make their way back to Snape instead.]
It's not my fault your bird went through the trash.
Get the hell off me first, dobe!
[It's swiftly followed by Sasuke unwrapping his arm from Naruto (he totally didn't clutch to his collar as they were falling) opting to shove at the blond's chest with both hands instead so he MOVES TH FUCK AWAY because this is all kinds of not okay.]
[It's swiftly followed by Sasuke unwrapping his arm from Naruto (he totally didn't clutch to his collar as they were falling) opting to shove at the blond's chest with both hands instead so he MOVES TH FUCK AWAY because this is all kinds of not okay.]
YOU'RE LEANIN' ON MY ARM!
[Not that he can do anything about it. Sasuke's shoving anyway-- and he lets himself fall back, eyes widening, but he quite simply rolls back and over onto the floor next to Sasuke, pulling his arm from under him.]
[Not that he can do anything about it. Sasuke's shoving anyway-- and he lets himself fall back, eyes widening, but he quite simply rolls back and over onto the floor next to Sasuke, pulling his arm from under him.]
[Severus' nostrils flare as he, too, raises his brow sharply at the man's response. Somewhere from within his room, Steven lets out a loud grunting noise. Severus whips around towards the door.]
Steven. Stop that nonsense.
[He whips back to the man, his eyes sharp, as Steven the emu lets out another, quieter but indignant grunt.]
How did it get in the trash in the first place? Why are you disposing of your… filth in here?
Steven. Stop that nonsense.
[He whips back to the man, his eyes sharp, as Steven the emu lets out another, quieter but indignant grunt.]
How did it get in the trash in the first place? Why are you disposing of your… filth in here?
[Oh right. The arm. He moves up a little and Naruto manages to pull it away, and also rolls away which is helped along with a huge shove from Sasuke, who is scrambling to his feet again.]
Get off my floor. [Whoops there's another kick to the leg hah]
Get off my floor. [Whoops there's another kick to the leg hah]
Page 16 of 25